Diary? Nothing that I wouldn't tell a client. Not everything that is written pertains to me or my life.
The things I see, hear...the people I talk to, all influence or impact my thoughts. Just saying!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Big Fat Snowflakes

The days get dark so fast. I like it though, when the dark settles in, the downtown trees light up and sparkle. And store windows and restaurants shine bright, and people's homes glow from within. It makes me want to take a walk and peer in.
I should probably stop telling people that I want lots of snow though, 'cause some of them start looking at me like I'm the bad one for wishing it so! I want it just to snow like two years ago in winter of 2008/2009. So that the snowflakes would be big, fat and heavy, and when they hit your eyeball straight on as you walk against the snowfall, you could actually feel it. Soft and fluffy. I am looking forward to bundling up. Hats, scarfs, warm boots! And I know lots of snow can cause problems. People get stuck, car accidents happen, electricity shuts down, people fall on ice.
But the nice thing is, when that happens, nice things happen too. The nice, helpful side of people comes out.
I remember how I was stuck on the corner of my block and my car wouldn't budge forward or back, and a neighbor from half a block away came to my rescue. I hadn't even asked! I watched him push my car out, fall flat on his face, clear out the snow, and free my car so I could go to work. I appreciated him so much and probably said thank you way too many times not knowing how to really show my gratitude and feeling so sorry for him for struggling so hard to help me!
I've also had to walk to work. It took me an hour. The buses weren't running. My car couldn't be driven out of the street. So I walked. I wouldn't have minded that so much, except that by the time I made it to work, I thought my legs above my knee were frozen and would fall off. It hurt so bad. I just didn't realize it would be so cold or such a long walk!
To tell you the truth, I don't mind if businesses shut down for a day, or electricity doesn't work. It will all come back the next day anyway. I think it just forces people slow down, light some candles and a fireplace if there is one, and maybe pause for a little.(Others, sadly, to panic.)

I just like winter to be the real thing! Yes, I'm not a fan of slush, and icy roads, or when it all gets black and ugly. I know how it feels to have bad roads. I've had bad driving conditions cause accidents. I know how it feels to have no traction, no stopping power, and no control of the car. Just last year, the night we had a thick sheet of ice for a road, I slammed head on, full force into a curb because there was nothing else I could do. Thankfully not into people, or other cars! So no, I don't want accidents or people getting hurt or anything else of that sort...
But for the most part it's magically beautiful. I remember standing at work looking out of our big windows. The sunlight was super bright, the air outside so cold, and all of a sudden it looked like magic dust, ice particles glistening like crystals in the air. I could stand and stare for a long time.
I know, I know. All the leaves havn't fallen yet. It's just, waiting for the first snowfall is so fun! The first time everything gets covered in a sheet of white...
I'm a dreamer. (It's those things that are instilled in me, who I am. Not things others want for me. Not because everyone else is doing those things. And what I do know, is that my dreams do come to reality, only in a timing I don't understand quite yet.) I know my imagination most of the time is way too big. But I can't help it. The thing I have done about it, is learned to not expect things how I would imagine them or how I would have done them. I've managed to expect less and be pleasantly surprised when it exceeds my expectations. Perfectionism isn't actually a positive characteristic. I think. I've had to learn not to be hard on myself. I've had to accept differences. Isn't that where the beauty lies? Where everyone does things differently. Thinks and sees differently. I've learned to take those other qualities of people who are laid back, easy going, into appreciation and to utilize it in my life! So when I can let things go, not care so much, and accept failures, it feels good. In myself, and others.
I've always thought that moderation and balance in everything, in life, is a key factor. Being too uptight, or being way careless would be far off. Working all the time or never just wouldn't work. Finding a middle ground is the ideal I will strive for in my life.
Why I am saying this? Kind of like a thank you to some people in my life that have shown me and influenced me. How amazing how we can learn and grow from each other in human relationships. You never know where life will go...People will come and go in my life, but a little of each person stays.
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.
Proverbs 27:17
I appreciate this verse a lot more now.