Diary? Nothing that I wouldn't tell a client. Not everything that is written pertains to me or my life.
The things I see, hear...the people I talk to, all influence or impact my thoughts. Just saying!

Thursday, April 28, 2011

The Reason I Don't Get Laser Surgery

On the streets: "Would it be weird if I told you, you look like Jessica Biel?" 

Movie of the month: The Tourist. This one is beautiful. Colors. Scenes! Ah!
Or. The Conspiracy Theory. This one? I just like.
Oh, there's a scene where the character's eyelids get taped up! Well, that's a reason that I don't get laser surgery. Freaks me out thinking my eyeballs have to sit open like that while some freaky laser thingy goes right into my eye. (obviously, there's a more technical, clinical breakdown of it all, but mine will do)  I'll wear glasses.                                        
So. Where am I in my Russian book that I bought? I have been preoccupied, therefore, I have not read any of it. That is how slow I am in reading Russian. But I blame the fact that April was super busy. All the way up to Easter. Now I feel relieved and more free once again. So now, I should read at least a chapter. Per month. Just kidding. I'll see what rate it will take me. It's not a novel, therefore, I can already say it will be a hard read.
(Just being a nerd. Pretending.)
No, that is not my Russian book. That's another one of those things I've slightly put off to the side. But if  it's not a priority, it will get put to the side. Sometimes, that is, sometimes, I can do only one thing at a time. 
By the way, I am not traveling to France. 
I just want to say, I absolutely love these verses:
We are not trying to please men but God,  who tests our hearts...We are not looking for praise from men, not from you or anyone else.
1st Thessalonians 2: 4b, 6
It takes all that fuss and cares of what anybody says or thinks right out of the picture. If I am doing everything and anything to please God, then the whole people pleasing idea goes right down the drain. Makes it so much simpler. I like it!
(I could elaborate on the people pleasing, because there's different kinds of 'people pleasing'...some other blog post. I could also elaborate on what people think and say, but that would be too long...)
On Thursday before Easter, I got to play a beautiful piece, alongside a cellist, for the choir. Cello is such a rich sounding instrument. And if fit the grave sadness of the song perfectly! Deep, sad chords paired with the rich cello. Went right to the heart.

Jesus, in Gethsemane, praying 'neath the olive trees,
falling there on bended knee, crying out in agony.
Our Lord, in deepest grief, filled with humility, 
poured out His soul into the night.
Father, take this cup from me. Take this cup from me.
There, in that quiet place, He felt death's cold embrace and lifted high the cup of grace.
Jesus, in Gethsemane, reaching for His destiny, lays aside His majesty, freely choosing Calvary.
There, inside the garden wall, as the night begins to fall, 
God's Son surrenders all for love.
Father, let Thy will be done. Let Thy will be done.
Jesus, in Gethsemane.

'Freely choosing' and 'felt death's cold embrace'.
I think of times I can't even give up some earthly comfort because I don't want to or need to. And here, Jesus freely chose to lay aside His majesty, to die for me and you!
I truly enjoyed that piece.
Christ Has Risen!!
You might say, Irina, Easter's over. Well, my friend, Easter is never over. Christ has risen and is alive.
And I can say that everyday!

There is no more saying, "it's OK" when it is not OK. 
There is no more pretense. 
Let other's words and actions speak for themselves. 
Let each one showcase themselves the way they want to be seen. And others to take it as they want. 
I don't need to put things in better light than they are. 
I don't need to makes things sound worse than they are either, of course. 
As my little grey book of 'cliches' states on it's back cover:
-It is what it is-